I had a lot I wanted to say this year about Giving... Giving Thanks... Giving of oneself... Giving by Donating. I'm a little late because I've been under the weather, but now that I'm starting to feel better I'm ready to put this all into words.

Giving Thanks

First I wanted to start by Giving Thanks. It's been a long time since I truly felt thankful for many things; and this year I feel thankful for A LOT!

I'm so very thankful for my HusCub and all of his support. Without him and his support I wouldn't be able to move forward with much of what I do in my life. His love and support is what keeps me going when the going gets rough, and it's what makes me brave enough to be all the Pup I can be! I love him with all of my heart and I cherish every moment I get to spend with him.

This year is the year I discovered my inner Pup through a chance meeting with the man who would also be my Alpha and his amazing Boyfriend. I'm so very thankful to have met Pup Gadget and his amazing boyfriend Pup FizzGig this year. Gadget & FizzGig made me feel comfortable and provided a safe space to explore my interests in Human Puppy Play. Without them, Farrstrider may not have found a way to burst through my inner barriers and become such a big and good part of my life.

This year has been full of so many new friends and I'm so very thankful to have had the opportunity to meet and befriend so many amazing humans and Pups this year! A lot of people probably don't realize, but until last year I'd spent quite a few years mostly friend-less... I'd thrown myself so far into my work life that I didn't really have a personal life. But that all changed last year when my Hubby & I made two of our best friends! Since then, we've continued to make more friends together, and this year I've even began making my own friends! I'm so lucky to have met so many incredible people who have all contributed so much to my life!

This time of year is a great time to really think about all that you're thankful for... but a lot of people don't realize that it's also a time to remind yourself to not take any of that for granted. The people and circumstances of your life can change in a heartbeat. So, yeah... never take anything for granted... because nothing is for granted.

Giving of Oneself

The theme of giving that this season brings about, has me thinking about a certain complaint I've seen a lot of in the Kink Community... not just in Puppy Play, but in all forms of Kinksters I follow on various social medias. There seems to be a theme that there are a few who Give of themselves to others, however, they don't often feel that they are being given back something in return. Typically, the complaint seems to be a lack of support and friendship given in return for having given of themselves in a Dominant form.

This makes me think a lot about Giving of myself, and as I entered into the Kink community this year I kept these thoughts in mind. I often find myself checking in with those whom I have or am forming relationships with to make sure that we're both getting what we need out of the relationship. With my Alpha, he gives so much of himself to me as the Alpha... looking out for me, guiding me, training me... his guidance, advice and the love he gives have made a great impact on my life. In return, I give to him obedience, truth, love and service.

A Dom & Sub relationship of any kind, even a casual one-off engagement, is still a relationship. It's important, for that to be successful, that the proper communication has taken place. Whether you're exploring a single engagement of incredibly hot play, or embarking on a long term journey... making your Experience or Journey a good one is all about communication.

Good communication in a Kinky relationship starts with negotiation. Negotiation is the act of communicating your desires... what you want, need and expect. As a part of Negotiation, each party will get to communicate their wants, needs and expectations and when one party is communicating, each of the other parties should be listening. This is the most important part of the process as it establishes a basis for everything that comes after. Additionally, the process of negotiation should never be "final"... it should be an ongoing conversation that evolves as the relationship grows and evolves as well.

A lot of the time, the onus is on the Dominant figure(s) to be doing a lot of the literal giving. But those fulfilling a Submissive role need to remember that the giving goes both ways. Especially if the relationship being formed is meant to be of a long-term nature. It's important to remember to reach out to your Dom(s), check in and make sure things are going to their liking, the same as they should be checking in with their Sub(s) to make sure they're getting what they need as well.

The point of all of this is just to make sure to keep the lines of communication open. It's easy to get "burnt out" on Subbing or Doming for others... and the only way to avoid that is to make sure to communicate. Check in with each other, make sure you're all getting what you need & want. Also... BE PRESENT! There's nothing worse than not being present for someone... especially when they're making the time to be present for you.

All of this applies to friendships as well. If you have friends who have been there for you, make sure you're there for them. Check in with each other, ask how they're doing, what's new, what's going on... you never know when a friend might just need to hear from a friend... or sit with them for a moment. It can make a huge difference, when you least expect it.

Giving by Donating

Well, it's Giving Tuesday after all... so of course I'm going to talk about donating. There are SO MANY ways to give by donating, but the only thing that really matters is whether or not what you're giving to is something you can believe in.

You might have noticed via Instagram/Facebook/Twitter that this particular Pupper is very touched by the Seattle Children's Hospital charity. I'm just personally touched by the intense challenges that the children are facing as patients and the way the money is used is just incredible. I'm a particularly big fan of the donation drive a local Radio Station, 106.1 KISS FM, here in Seattle. They do a Radiothon each year, where they spend an ENTIRE DAY at the hospital sharing stories and asking for donations. These donations make it possible for the hospital to treat patients regardless of their families ability to pay.

This particular charity just speaks to something on a very personal level with me. I feel that it transcends the divisions in society... as it's not an issue of gender, sexuality, politics... it's just children... and we were all children once. Now, that's not to say that it's the only good charity, there are countless amazing causes to consider.

Another local charity I like to support is the Lambert House. It's an LGBT organization and does amazing work in our community here. Several members of SEA-PAH (my local PAH) and the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence worked together over the Thanksgiving weekend to raise over $1000 for Lambert House! An amazing job!

Now, I know not everyone can afford to give... but anyone can afford to share. So, on this Giving Tuesday I'm going to ask you to consider Giving by Donating. If you're in a position to donate money, please do! If you're not, then please spread the word! Every little bit helps, from spreading the word to giving any amount you can afford to.

In the spirit of Giving, this Pupper would be most honored if you might consider contributing to a Facebook Fundraiser for Seattle Children's Hospital, a part of the Children's Miracle Network of Children's Hospitals. You can find a link to the fundraiser on my facebook page at: https://facebook.com/pupfarrstrider Or, you can go directly to the fundraiser by clicking this link instead: https://www.facebook.com/donate/1265650603546531/10212610526032988/

Thank you! Have a happy Giving Tuesday!🐾